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02:09pm 12/06/2010

wrote that song in 10 minutes. that's probably why it is less than 2 minutes long. performed it in gym clothes, sorry that's not a very rock star appearance, oh well.

so i turned into a vegan for a few days. don't know if it will last, as i usually break down, but i'm not starving like i was last time... once you actually read all the things you can eat (like i can have more than celery and apples, duh, which is what i was living on last time).

got a plane ticket for brooklyn. yayyayyayyayyay.
got tickets to the national. yay yay yay.
got my first offer for a solo show in september. yay yay. etc. the end.
1 secret handshake| kiss the bottle
dear diary.   
11:11pm 05/05/2010
  i'm sorry but tumblr, tweets, and fb statuses are killing me.

i cannot follow people in blurbs! c'mon.

but i guess pointless me-me-me blogs aren't so fun, either.

gc is recording on mother's day. (i'm a terrible daughter) i'm seriously so very incredibly excited.
2 shows this month @ the pinhook & in wilmington. we haven't played since troika. uhoh,herewego.
i'm really excited about visiting my good ole college town again.
grad school is WAY less fun than college. in fact, grad school isn't fun at all.

i still don't have a total plan for WE fest. there are various persons&places to see&crash, but no solid plans and only a handful of acquaintances. there are various people i'm nervous/thrilled about seeing again and various places i want to visit, but do what there? just go and sit and breathe and think about old times? hm.

i guess i am thinking of maybe moving back to carrboro. like that was even so great the first time around. pff. it was mostly just great hanging out/living with one of my bffs, but i think that might've been fun anywhere, right?
plus, moving now to carrboro might blow my bigger plans to move to bigger cities later. but is that even what i want?
wtfdoiwant. oh the big questions of 20somethings. where am i going? that's another fun one.
i will be 24 in not too long here. a week and some days, actually. lordy.

despite this sounding like a downer entry, i'm pretty happy with life right now. confused, yes. but happy.

remember when everything was poetic?
kiss the bottle
11:11am 31/03/2010

i may not be 80 years old, but i want one of these so bad.
it's $259. shit.

kiss the bottle
08:42am 02/03/2010
  dear guy sitting across from me at the coffeeshop,

please stop being at total DICK to your kids. they are adorable AND well behaved. so just stop.

thank you,


also i really want my bangs cut off again.


also i don't want to go to work in 19 minutes.
kiss the bottle
09:14pm 10/02/2010
  i've got american idol on.
i just googled "the great wolf lodge."

in other words...WHAT IS GRAD SCHOOL DOING TO ME?!

my drummer is getting married and so has basically quit the band. in adam's words...it was fun while it lasted.

i'm tired all the time.

i wish more people still updated their livejournals, even though these things are comPLETELY silly. maybe i could just do things the old fashioned way and actually keep in touch with others.

thursday: movie with jeffjeff
friday: allison's last day in town
saturday: class
sunday: die

kiss the bottle
03:49pm 10/01/2010
  i think i want to go to bonnaroo???? i don't know exactly why this idea has taken over me...but i think it is something i would like to experience. i generally enjoy sleeping in tents...and i love music. so. of course, i may be paying $234 for severe sunburn and dehydration, but if i'm smart enough maybe it will be okay.

now i just need to convince a friend or friends to go with me. dammit.
i think anyone who might be adventurous enough to do this has already moved out of north carolina...BOO. boo. boooooo. i should really get on following them.

school has started.
here is what i have to say about that: MER.

reading some good books. here is what they are.
"tinkers" paul harding (super imagery, tiny plot)
"this is where i leave you" jonathan tropper (still making my mind up about this one, but there are lots of lolz in it)
two very different books. both published in 2009, i believe. good times.

listening to some good music.
watching some good movies.
getting some decent heartbreaks in, but barely feeling it anymore.
oh yeah and playing a lot of wii.
i miss a lot of people. the end.
2 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
10:13pm 14/10/2009
  now, i have not really thought one way or another about death cab for cutie for awhile, but really?! they wrote a song about bella and edward?! first ben gibbard drops, like, 60 pounds. then he gets engaged to zooey deschanel. now he is singing about vampires and abstinence? this is suh-weet.

3 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
04:16pm 02/09/2009
mood: working
i will water your flowers while you are gone.
i will wear the same dress three days in a row.
i will not shave my knees.
i will sweat cold in my sleep.
i will sing throughout the house.
and i will leave the blinds open at night.
kiss the bottle
i am at the beach / other things.   
05:11pm 16/07/2009
  salt water makes my hair look awesome. sort of like a lion. went on a turtle walk. no turtles. yoga on the beach is my new favorite thing. bingo tonight. maybe i will win some money.
i would love to bring a group of friends to this beach shack and just bum around. too bad things like that are really hard to make happen. and all they sell on this island is super cheap beer. i mean, besides other things like kites and trinkets and ice cream and kayak rentals.
my past won't go away lately. especially people from my past. and i don't know what to think about it, exactly. hm. ponder, ponder.
kiss the bottle
whiskey for dessert   
11:02pm 24/06/2009
mood: determined
"whiskey, huh? i respect that."
i am going to nc central in the fall for library science. i am very excited. now i need to find a good house to move to in durham. i would like a yard. i would like to garden. i have never really tried to garden, not since i was 9. i would like a front porch, so that i may play my guitar poorly and poorly sing and all my neighbors may hear. i would like room to have a cat. so that i may bring o'hara to my house. i would like for it all to be magically paid for. i really want and want and want, don't i?
durham could be neat. should be neat. will be neat.
i need to make new friends. all of mine are crazy or moving or are already not here anymore.
if i were really brave i would move to new york city. but i don't think i am that brave. the end.
3 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
4 ghost cats of the south   
08:59am 08/04/2009
mood: okay
cringe into the shutter lens/humidity at elbow bends/snap the picture by the lake/where all the kids skinny dip/swim through moments, you and me/shuffle days like words in a magnetic dictionary/and promise you know how to rewind film/we solve for x on the weekends/and y mostly on wednesdays/if you can get more friends, well get them/lord knows you could use some/we stack the months like alphabet blocks/and time spells out "believe" and we believe for just a second, or two, or three/we forget to wear sunblock/and we forget how to pray/but in the dark, i still know your face/you take up laughter as a hobby/no one remembers how to take us seriously/we have 27 exposures to prove the equation/we have 24 hours now to fit one more day in.
if nothing else comes to me/will the wind still be wild?/if nothing else comes to me/will the flashlight still light up the hall?/i've lost pocket change quietly/i've changed and pocketed fond memories/they blanket these present days/thick wool in this heat/if sleep never comes to me/will the neighbors still throw bottles into the street?/if sleep never comes to me/will the glass sing at my feet?/because i've taken to calling up old friends again/ask what's become of them, at 2 a.m./birds slice up the inky sky like commas/silence on the phone like a promise/if love never comes to me/will my books be enough company?/if love never comes to me/will vanilla cigarettes still be a bad habit?/i don't know/i. don't. know.
oh yeah, i guess life is okay. i play a lot of music, work a shit job, apply to grad schools that will probably just laugh in my face, and have a hard time meeting people. sweet
if anybody lives in greensboro, my band (www.myspace.com/ghostcatsofthesouth) is playing a show april 24 at 7:00 at the maya art gallery for a book release. it is our first show! and it is free!
2 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
05:01pm 11/08/2008
  and you saaaaayCollapse )  
2 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
bummer summer?   
10:48pm 16/07/2008
mood: confused
waltz #3.
We ate lime sorbet in your step mom’s living room/and I learned you never kept secrets. Well who does?/
So I squealed the f-word and she chased us outside with her broom./Your pa was there on the back porch playing solitaire./I mean, he was pretty good for having bent up fingers./We watched his patterns of picking cards./We watched the moon rise above the pine trees,/And I felt my stomach stir/As your pa gazed out with empty eyes./Your step mom said he had a slow mind./But at least she came out and apologized/Then said it was time for me to go on home./So we rode our bikes in the dark/And you told me you thought I was smart,/And I told you quit lying, quit following me./So you stopped./You had a baseball card in your spokes./It whirred you away into the night./And that was the last time we spoke.
soooo my 14-year-old cat had to be put to sleep because she had tumors in her stomach. i haven't lost an animal since i was 2 and it's really weird to think that she won't be around anymore.
i miss elida deklein. just throwin' that out there. why is brooklyn so far? i don't get it.
don't you hate it when you are trying to make a playlist and then you totally get stuck listening to some awesome song on itunes and THEN you can't put it on your playlist because you just listened to it and that makes you sick of it for about another two weeks? i hate when that happens.
yesterday i watched spirited away. today i saw hellboy. nerdy much?
2 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
new songgggggggggggggg   
02:38pm 06/07/2008
  This land is teach yourself how to live land
Where they write down in notebooks everything you say.
But what you do down by the river stays by the water, man
We’re all trying to live on, in our own way.
We got books and cassettes
Got hymns with style
Got masterwork classics
Got blues and jazz,
So play on play on, play a different song
Now we know how to live with style,
Got floral couches and well-bred cats
Got $29 bottles of wine.
We play recitals now
In an auditorium
We change our strings once a month.
So when will it be enough?
I mean when will we draw the line?
$200 pairs of jeans
And we still don’t know a damn thing,
About living and loving and making it up as we go along.
We just write song after song hoping it will solve enough, help enough, be enough,
pass another problem along, into some heads trying to let the time go by.
But you know how you wanna be, all big city, sayin what you want to say.
But we know how to live with style,
oh, we know.
so i'm all full of burritos and my eye is all swollen up and i found my straightener so that's neat and i'm thinking about asking someone to come visit and i'm thinking about visiting some people and i leave for edisto island on tuesday and i'ma be gone for six days and DEEP BREATH living life is exhausting sometimes, i mean: damn.
why can't someone write on my facebook wall every other second? is that so much to ask for?
i can't wait to get back to normal life, as in school, as in wilmington, as in music. because living at my parents house is B-O-R-I-N-G. plus i'm allergic to the 10,000 animals they have and by 10,000 i mean 3 and by 3 i mean i am in love with my cat, o'hara, but really summertime shedding? thanks.
1 secret handshake| kiss the bottle
11:57am 02/07/2008
  here are pictures from a house show (sebotka, ponchos from peru, and a surprise set from the nothing noise), a random late evening at ihop, and one picture from bluepost.
enjoy, fellow ljers.

because facebook won't work...Collapse )
11 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
08:48pm 16/05/2008
mood: geeky
there are fireflies outsideeeeeee.
kiss the bottle
happy birthday to me (thanks for all the bday wishes!)   
05:56am 15/05/2008
  22 is my lucky number.
i'm excited about the upcoming year.
coffee is my new best friend.
besides, like, my cat.
2 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
05:10am 14/05/2008
mood: hangin' in there
more 5:00 a.m. picture stories, aren't you guys happy.Collapse )

p.s. i <3 4 hour naps.
p.s.s. i forgot it was my birthday until strangers wrote on my facebook wall. oh and like my real friends called me and stuff. :)
3 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
09:21am 13/05/2008

realllllly want to go see these guys in greenville. c'mon, it's on my birthday!! c'mon...layers are delicious.
man, though. it's so kinda-far away aka damn you gas prices.
stupid soapbox... always playing with all the wrong kinds of bands instead of bands like this.
oh well, at least i may get some cash-a-roo.

off to feed my kitty her kitty inhaler (it's red liquid, looks cherry flavored, although i'm sure baby O would appreciate tuna more). THEN BACK TO WILMINGTON.
3 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle
life, interrupted.   
03:09pm 12/05/2008
  stuck in fuquay photo times.Collapse )

my cat has to go to the hospital.
keep o'hara in your thoughts, please.
5 secret handshakes| kiss the bottle